Ask a Widow: How Do I Start to Date Again?

Hello, Internet! Welcome to Ask Dr. NerdLove , the only dating advice column that’s secretly responsible for ending The Time War. This week we have a very different kind of question from a reader: how does he make it clear that he doesn’t want to date?

Oct 14, – Readers, are you sitting down? Because I’m about to drop a major bombshell I am single again. (You’re welcome, straight men.) I know what.

It can be scary getting back into dating after a long break. Sometimes, past relationships can leave us with worries about what future relationships might be like. This is especially common if things ended badly, but can also apply even if things ended fairly amicably. Relationships can leave deep wounds — sometimes deeper than we realise. You may feel like you did everything to save the relationship while your partner did nothing. You may even feel like they actively sabotaged things.

This can leave you bitter, and wary of showing the same level of trust in someone new. Sometimes, changes in circumstances — or changes in people — can be enough for something that worked previously to stop working a few years down the line. This can be equally hard to deal with, especially if you both feel you did everything you could to save the relationship. It can leave you fearful that exactly the same thing could happen again. Friends and family — people you can trust and who you know will listen to you — can be a great help.